I just love spending an hour and a half to get ready and then getting ditched…
(via ohwhatagreat)
I just want someone to come over, get drunk with me and watch shit on Netflix…
panda slide. [video]
Apparently,
When I’m drunk, I’m fluent in Farsi and I can impress the brown guys at the hookah bar…
also, apparently, I’m attractive enough to ruin a marriage.
and also, I’m such a good kisser that I can make a girl realize she’s bisexual.
good night, good night, indeed.
I just remembered that I petted an alligator last night!
